& that's the thing about
crushing on someone.
It just have to hurt so much, so much. I thought I took the correct path. But seems like I was wrong.
It was all gone, in
one second. That was how fast things could be. Maybe being optimistic about things all the time isn't good after all. You would just end up feeling even more hurt, like how I am now. I don't know what exactly is happening actually. I don't even know it myself. Maybe it was all like a dream. I should really wake up and get back to reality. It is difficult, time heal all wounds. Time, it may be days, months or even years. I chose this, and all I've got was maybe less than a minute of happiness and hours & hours of sorrow.
Was it even the right choice?
I guess I kinda came to the conclusion that I made the wrong choice this time round. With so little expectation, yet nothing comes. It could seem so easy, but actually it isn't. I'm tired of this, I want to end this :(
It started off as good impression, and now it hurts SO MUCH!I never thought my mood could change within a second.
Now I know.
I don't want the 29th to come. Because I know what's going to happen and I don't want it to happen because I can't accept it. I just can't.
You think its easy but its hell not. You will never know how much a small gift or a wish from you would matter. haha. I know I won't receive anything from you anyway, but I just feel damn sad, because you are giving her. I dont know why :(Just friends, but it seemed so difficult now. All I wanted, was to be your friend. I think I'm so far away from that. Was it too much of me to ask for that? :( Just friends. Really, that is all I want.